Showing Gratitude

By Rose O. Sherman, EdD, RN, NEA-BC, FAAN

I often ask nurse leaders to talk about how they are flexing to meet the needs of their younger workforce. Recently, a nurse manager talked about how she has instilled gratitude into her conversations with staff.  She observed – I did not use to do this. I am old school and was raised with a work ethic where you show up and do your job. Kudos are for going over and above. If I did that today, I would have no staff. My staff want to be thanked and noticed for everything they do, so I have flexed my style. Showing gratitude has helped me see the good in my staff, and I notice more of what they do for our patients and each other.

This leader has learned that as leaders, we have two powerful tools in our leadership toolbox: gratitude and appreciation. What is so interesting about gratitude is that while you make others feel good, Harvard research has found that thanking others will also make you happier. In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships. In a recent AONL compendium, 55% of nurse managers reported that giving awards and recognition was among the top five tasks that bring them joy. Hence, there is also a strong business case for nurse manager retention.

We are living with complex challenges right now in nursing. In recent research, IH-Nurse-Study-2023-Summary, 93% of nurses now report that staffing shortages are their number one concern. Peter Drucker, whom many consider one of the most outstanding thought leaders on management, observed that the job of leaders is to interpret reality even in the toughest of circumstances. At the same time, he believed that a leader is responsible for keeping hope alive and focusing on what works well. Having an attitude of gratitude can help to balance out the adverse effects of challenges and stresses. So, during this Thanksgiving week, the following are five ways that nurse leaders can develop an attitude of gratitude mindset and lead with gratitude:

1. Keep a Gratitude Journal Just for the Week

In his work on gratitude, Dr. Robert Emmons found that keeping a gratitude journal resulted in better sleep and more energy. Each day, take the time to consider 3-5 things that you feel grateful for. These could be simple magic moments like a baby’s smile or a close friend’s call, or perhaps more considerable achievements like acceptance to graduate school or a new job. The journal’s point is to develop a conscious mindset to focus on the positive things in life.

2. Challenge Yourself Not to Whine or Complain 

Have you ever noticed how whining can be contagious? There are problems in every work environment, and people spend most of their time focused on the negative. Commit yourself to thinking and speaking positively. If you are very upset about a situation, give yourself a time limit to vent your concerns and move on to more positive thoughts. Be grateful for the tough times because it will teach you to deal with adversity; there are always some positive outcomes from even the most negative experience. In most situations, it is essential to consider that things could be worse than what you are experiencing,

3. Show Appreciation

If you actively look for things to be grateful for, you may be surprised at how much good there is in your life. Appreciation of others can profoundly impact their lives and make you feel better. Great nursing leaders know that it is vital to appreciate nurses for what they do and praise them for their work. I published a blog where a CNO went incognito as a traveler and was struck by the lack of appreciation that she observed. It is a powerful reminder that nurses work very hard and need recognition.

4. Write Thank You Notes and Emails

Take the time to send a note or email of Appreciation to that person that you may take for granted but deserves your thanks. People will never really know the positive impact that they have unless you tell them. You will brighten someone’s day, and it will make you feel better as well.

5. Create Magic Moments for Staff This Week

In their work, The Power Of Moments: Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact, authors Chip and Dan Heath explore why specific brief experiences can jolt, elevate, and change us—and how we can learn to create such extraordinary moments in life and work. These moments build pride and connection. Do something very unexpected this week for your staff to break the script. The authors found that of all the ways we can create moments of pride for others, the simplest is to offer them recognition.

Gratitude is a way of investing in both ourselves and others. So commit to leading with gratitude this Thanksgiving week and thank those who make a difference.

Thank you for being a leader and reading this blog.

© emergingrnleader.com 2023

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Other Programs/Books Your Leaders May Find Valuable

From Traditional Nurse Leader to Nurse Leader Coach – Click Here for the Flyer

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Read the Nurse Leader Coach – Available at Amazon and Other Book Sellers

Recommended Book by the Association of Critical Care Nurses – The Nuts and Bolts of Nursing Leadership: Your Toolkit for Success