Assuming Good Intentions - Emerging Nurse Leader

By Rose O. Sherman, EdD, RN, NEA-BC, FAAN

A nurse manager recently discussed her efforts to implement a cultural reset on her unit in a session. She told the following story:

I have been in my role for almost a decade. The recent uptick in staff conflict has startled me. Some of my team members have become so negative that they automatically default to assuming the worst about their colleagues. Initially, I managed it through coaching by asking questions like, ‘How do you know your assumptions are true in this situation?’ We are now way beyond that and are resetting our team values. I have let the team vote on values, except one that I feel is non-negotiable at this time: assuming good intentions about each other. I think it is fundamental to restoring trust.

This nurse manager has a point. We all have the power to assume either positive or negative intent in situations. When we become frustrated with someone, it’s easy to allow our inner monologue to tell the story of hate and mistrust. It almost feels natural to turn those who hurt us into villains in our heads. But life is never that simple. Even nurse managers confess to doing this. When managing staff, it is easy to get caught up in our internal drama and then triangulate — that is, divide the staff between those who “get” us and those who don’t.

Dr. Stephen R. Covey suggests that the way to improve our relationships is through the simple act of assuming good intentions. People are rarely thinking about us as much as we would like to believe. It is easy to feel slighted by a comment from a staff member or colleague, considering that we might be overreacting. By assuming good intentions from the speaker, we can override our instinct to take offense at an offhand comment directed in our general direction and instead focus on the issue being raised in the discussion. This type of patience requires a keen sense of focus and hard work. It means that we don’t always jump to take things personally. When people lash out at one another, it is rarely only because of what is happening in the moment.

In an interview with Fortune magazine, Indra Nooyi, former Chairman and CEO of Pepsi, says that her father was a firm believer in assuming positive intent, and she adopted this as her leadership philosophy. She said, “When you assume negative intent, you’re angry. If you take away that anger and assume positive intent, you will be amazed. Your emotional quotient increases because you are no longer responding randomly. You don’t get defensive. You don’t scream. You are trying to understand and listen because at your basic core, you are saying, ‘Maybe they are saying something to me that I’m not hearing.’ So, ‘assume positive intent’ has been an enormous piece of advice for me.

If you assume positive intent, your relationships with others will be better. It will make you feel better, your relationships will thrive, and it’s an approach more aligned with reality. I think this nurse manager makes a valid point about assuming good intentions as a starting point in redefining values. Failing to assume good intentions is at the root of so many conflict situations.

Read to Lead

Covey, Stephen M.R. (2010). The speed of trust: The one thing that changes everything. Free Press.

Our Most Popular Right Now The New World of Work Workshop

Two Brand New Workshops for Your Team in 2025

*** Trending – Building Bridges Not Walls: Leading Multigenerational Work Teams – Click Here for More Information Building Bridges Not Walls

Nurse and Nurse Leader Work-Life Balance and Well-Being: Nursing Leadership Strategies for Success – Click Here for More Information WorkLife Balance and Wellbeing WS

New Book – Click Here to Buy