By Rose O. Sherman, EdD, RN, NEA-BC, FAAN
A leader colleague recently told me that she kept a copy of my blog on nurse leaders’ mistakes on her desk as a reminder. I wrote the blog in 2018, but everything in it is still relevant, now more than ever, and I have updated it below:
Most leadership mistakes are not big failures but smaller mistakes that they often repeated early in their careers. Experience is a good teacher, but as one seasoned leader laughingly told me, “to be honest, I was not a quick learner early in my career….it seemed that I had to learn everything the hard way. I still make mistakes today, but not the same ones that I used to make”.
We should learn from our own mistakes and learn from the experiences of other nurse leaders. I have compiled ten of the most common mistakes that nurse managers have discussed with me.
The Top Ten List
1. Failing to deal with performance problems early enough
This is probably the single most common mistake that nurse leaders make, especially early in their careers. They wait too long to take action on poor performers and fail to hold them accountable for their behavior. Often, poor performers are difficult to deal with. The leader does not want to face the confrontation that counseling will bring or keeps hoping the employee will change.
2. Avoiding a conflict that later escalated
Conflict management is a big challenge for many nurse leaders. They often avoid the conflict, hoping it will just go away. That rarely happens, and the conflicts escalate out of control. In an earlier post, I discussed carefronting differently to think about and approach these conflicts.
3. Selecting a staff member that was not a good fit for the unit out of desperation
The nursing shortage is beginning to resurface as a challenge again. During times of nursing shortages, nurse leaders are often confronted with too few applicants for their positions. Often against their better judgment and desperation, the leader will select an applicant despite serious misgivings about the goodness of fit for the unit. These selections rarely work out, and nurse leaders come to regret their mistakes.
4. Trying to be liked by everyone
As a nurse leader, your relationship with your staff changes. You can’t be their best friend. It is important to strike the right balance and realize that leading change usually means ruffling someone’s feathers. Being a leader requires that you need to develop a thick skin and take the heat without taking it personally. This does get easier with time.
5. Taking action without knowing the whole story
The new leader often wants to be seen as being action-oriented in their positions. You can pay a heavy price in leadership if you act too quickly on limited information. Hearing all sides of the story is important. When staff presents problems with another staff member or department, it is important to listen carefully. But before you formulate an opinion about what happened and who may be at fault – get all sides to the story. You may end up being quite surprised as situations usually end up being much more complex and nuanced than the picture painted when they are first presented.
6. Losing an excellent staff member without really finding out why
It can be challenging to lose valued staff members. Nurse leaders often attribute the loss to the individual moving on to other career opportunities. That may be true, but maybe not. There may be problems or challenges on the unit that would be valuable feedback. For example, the research literature on bullying tells us that environments, where this occurs have retention problems. Most nurses report that they did not discuss the situation with their manager.
7. Acting in anger over a situation and later regretting it
Anger is a powerful emotion. A leader’s immediate reaction to an explosive situation is usually emotion-laden. As a wise mentor once told me, “when I feel this way – I tell myself to calm down – go home and think about it carefully before saying anything.” This is when a trusted mentor to talk through the situation with can be very helpful.
8. Failing to spend enough time developing relationships with staff and colleagues
Nurse leaders have very busy roles. It is easy to get so wrapped up in your own workload that you don’t make yourself available to your team or establish relationships with colleagues. Make it a priority to get out of your office each day to make rounds, talk with staff and meet with colleagues. Leadership can be very isolating, but often leaders isolate themselves.
9. Being misunderstood because communication was not carefully worded
Words have power, and in leadership, people do listen carefully to the words that we use. A careless response to a question can easily circulate quickly among staff and not convey the leader’s meaning. In difficult situations, it is even more important to think through the language you are using carefully.
10. Not being open to feedback
Effective nurse leaders make sure they listen actively to their employees and their peers. This means being open to feedback that may not always be positive. You may not always agree with the perspective offered, but you need to respect how others may view you. If you are open to feedback, your staff will be more honest and open with you to help you succeed.
As a nurse leader, you will make mistakes. In research that I have conducted with leaders, they indicate that the key has the insight to look at your mistakes, acknowledge them and learn from them. There is nothing that the nursing staff appreciates more than a leader who can confidently say, “I was wrong.”
Read to Lead
Hader, R. (2012). Forgive and Forget Nursing Management. 43(4), 6.
Sherman, RO (2021) The Nuts and Bolts of Nursing Leadership: Your Toolkit for Success. Published on Amazon
© emergingrnleader.com 2021
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