Requests for Your Time – Should You Say Yes or No?

By Rose O. Sherman, EdD, RN, FAAN

If you ask leaders about their challenges, tactfully managing requests for their time is high on the list.  It can be hard to say no to interesting new projects, committee or board assignments or volunteer activities.  And over time, these requests increase as you move up the ladder in an organization.  Women often have a harder time saying no, and experience more guilt when they do.  Yet to be effective in your role and maintain a semblance of work-life balance, it is important to know when to say no and when to say yes.  Always take some time before immediately responding and then carefully evaluate the request.  The following are some additional guidelines from the experts:

Say Yes When

1.  There is a clear strategic benefit to either you personally or to your organization.

2.  Involvement in the activity is part of your job description.

3.  You are passionate about the work.

4.  You will grow professionally or personally from the experience.

5.  You can comfortably commit the time needed for the project.

6.  There are members in the group who could be valuable future strategic partners or personal friends.

7.  The person who is making the request or leading the group is someone who has been very generous to you when asked for their time.

Say No When

1.  You lack passion for the project and  it is something that you really don’t want to do.

2.  The time involved in the assignment is beyond what you can reasonably commit with your current schedule.

3.  The project or assignment is under-resourced or funded to complete the intended goals.

4. There is no new learning or professional development in the assignment.

5.  The project or assignment has a long timeline and you are unsure that you can make a long-term commitment.

6.  There is an expectation that you will donate time/money/resources to the project that you are not in a position to do.

7.  You don’t visibly see how your talents will be used.

8.  The vision of the team/committee or group is unclear and you have concerns about damaging your own reputation.

Saying no can be difficult but most of us have also found ourselves in situations where we said yes reluctantly, and later regretted our decision.  Keep in mind that when you say no to a new commitment, you are in fact honoring your existing obligations.  You are also ensuring that you will be able to devote quality time to them.  Some people will be pushy so you need to learn to be firm but polite in your decisions.  If you allow it, the priorities of others could crowd out time you have to spend with your family and close friends.  Don’t leave the door open for further negotiation.  You may find yourself saying no to good things in order to focus on higher priorities. Saying no may also allow you to try new things.  It is important to recognize that your resources are finite to avoid the guilt trap.  Saying no is about respecting and valuing your time and space.  If done well, people may not be happy with your refusal but they will understand.

Read to Lead

Borg, A. ( Anita Borg Institute Blog)  When to Say NO to Stretch Assignments. 

Fripp, P.  (August 2013 Blog)  How to Say “NO” by Saying “YES” .