Five Things Nurse Leaders Should Stop Saying to Staff

By Rose O. Sherman, EdD, RN, FAAN

“It is not the mountain that we conquer, but ourselves.” Edmund Hillary

We often don’t realize in leadership the power of the words that we use to influence others either in a negative or positive way. In leadership development, we spend a great deal of time talking with leaders about things they need to do to be more effective. Less time is spent on what we need to stop doing. I asked a group of nurses what phrases they would like to see their bosses STOP using. The following are the top five:

1. That’s just the way I am.

I recently had a nurse leader colleague tell me that she knows she can be very sarcastic in some of her responses to questions asked by staff. She felt she was vindicated because she always warns her staff “that’s just the way I am.” I am sure her staff wonders why if she knows her comments are inappropriate and hurtful, she not work to control her sarcasm.

2. That can’t be done.

There is no greater idea killer than the phrase “that can’t be done.” Some leaders quickly respond to suggestions with this phrase. Even when the suggestion seems outside the bounds of what can be done in an organization – a better response would be that you are not sure it is doable but will investigate the possibilities.

3. You need to work smarter instead of harder.

Health care organizations today are struggling to reduce costs. Staffing is one of the largest parts of any organizational budget so it is not surprising that there have been staffing cuts. Staff look to their leaders for guidance about how to more effectively manage a larger number of patients. The response you need to work smarter instead of harder” has become a well-worn cliche that is not helpful. Leaders need to provide some specific guidance about what parts of the work of nursing could be either delegated or omitted when the staffing is reduced.

4. That was not my fault.

Professional accountability is hot issue today in nursing. This accountability for one’s actions needs to start with nurse leaders. The reality is that when you are in a leadership role – you are accountable at some level for mistakes and errors that happen that impact your patients or staff. Nursing staff don’t respect leaders who always look to find someone to blame when a mistake occurs whether it is an administrative or clinical error.

5. Failure is not an option.

We don’t live a risk free world and failure is always a possibility despite our best efforts. A nurse told me that her manager has the phrase Failure is not an Option on her outgoing email signature. She observed that her organization is trying to improve patient safety by implementing a blame free culture. You can imagine, she reflected, how unlikely it is that staff would bring any mistakes to her attention knowing her attitude toward failure. It is very likely that is not at all the message that this manager meant to convey to her staff.

As I often mention in this blog, nursing leadership is a journey. We grow and learn from our successes and failures. Every leader probably uses phrases repeatedly that are not seen as helpful to the staff that they supervise. It may be that you use one of the phrases on list above but perhaps not. You won’t know if you don’t ask.