By Rose O. Sherman, EdD, RN, FAAN
New nurse leaders are often surprised at how even the most casual remarks that they make take on serious meaning to staff. A Chief Nursing Officer once told me that she was “thinking aloud” as she rounded on a unit and wondered about whether it might make strategic sense to make the unit an observation unit. Within days, the word was convey through her facility that the unit was being converted to an observation unit when no leadership decision had been made to do this. It is an important realization that leaders speak in an amplified voice. Staff pay very close attention to the messages that are sent by leaders and requests that are made. Staff look to their leaders for strategic direction and what they convey in their conversations.
1. Create a Culture of Inclusiveness
The pronouns used by leaders can help build a culture of inclusiveness. Excessive use of the word they on a team is a sign of problems with harmony and teamwork. It also characterizes environments where there is blame game going on. Instead of “they” – leaders need to shift the language to the pronoun “we”. It is one of the most important words in leadership language. It is inclusive, builds a team culture and helps to break down silos in organizations. Never describe anyone as “just a staff nurse”.
2. Encourage Others
Words that are affirming help to make people feel good. Encouraging words help to get others through difficult times. Leaders need to work hard not to cut off conversation with words like ”yes….but or however”. These words indicate that you don’t approve of what has been said. When a team member introduces a new idea, a leader needs to avoid say “I know that” or “I have done that before”. Leaders who excessively use the word “I” instead of “we” may be taking more credit than they deserve in situations. Leaders also need to be careful about their use of the possessive pronoun my using it to describe “my unit” or my team”. This can imply a level of tacit ownership that others may resent.
3. Build Relationships
A key leadership skill is to build relationships with others. Words that recognize the contributions and strengths of others help to create positive relationships. Every leader has probably had the experience of using just the right words in a relationship to help it grow or using the wrong choice of words that made the situation worse. Some choices of words that can be damaging when working with a staff member are: “What you NEED to do …”,“What you SHOULD do …”,“What you MUST do” or “If I were you….I would”. These words can completely shut down a conversation.
As your leadership journey continues, work hard to avoid making casual remarks that don’t convey your priorities or can be interpreted as being negative. Leaders speak in an amplified voice are judged by the words they use. Confucius said that “words are the voice of the heart”. Learning to choose your words wisely will help you to grow into the type of nurse leader your staff will not want to leave.
© emergingrnleader.com 2014